2003-06-13 - 7:53 a.m.
Intellectual instinct
It is now a little after 7:30. I have been up since 6 am. I went to bed at 1. My body hates me. It’s pretty tough to pack up an apartment when you’re trying to nap all day.
But I have to do something today; I’m planning to take my clothes and dishes and some other odds and ends to the Jewish ladies’ thrift shop in Fairfax. They give to four different charities, and I like that. I just have to get off my ass and take the old dishes down from the closet shelf and get the tablecloths and the desk lamps, which is all fine, but I have to DO it, and that’s easier said than done. I am WAY sleepy.
And I took yesterday “off”. Also a sleep issue, but mostly because I went to Rockville to spend the afternoon and evening with K and the baby. We made a brisket (the house smelled like Mom’s by the time it was done) and went to the bookstore and got coffee and went to CVS to get a prescription for the munchkin, who has some kind of rash on his legs, poor thing. He’s not hurting, so it’s fine, it just looks ugly.
While we were in the bookstore, K and I started talking about books and what we were reading, and she mentioned the book club that another of our friends had started. When the idea of the book club came up, I declined; I knew instinctively that I would NOT enjoy discussing a book with these people, especially the friend who started the thing. She’s competitive and defensive, and she’s always RIGHT, and she can never see the other side of anything. She and several other people in this book club work in a form of math, basically, and there’s a lot of black and white thinking there. I hate black and white thinking, and in my opinion, that’s no way to run a book club.
So I spent a week or so wondering if I was being stupid and antisocial, then I got over it and basically forgot about it. And then K said something about the friend’s “ultra-competitive book club.” Ha! I knew it. (I’m allowed to gloat a bit, OK? Thanks.) K confirmed all of my fears, then she told me that halfway through the first meeting she realized that I had made a good decision, and she wished she’d made the same one. I like being right, sure (I admit it! Finally!), but I could feel K’s frustration, and that sucked. The first book they read was one I really enjoyed in high school, and I had ideas about it myself that weren’t exactly obvious, and I would have HATED to be told, “No it’s NOT!” the way K told me she was. Eek. How do people reach adulthood like this?
The rest of the afternoon with K went well. She had to run a quick errand after we’d settled in, so I watched the munchkin for a bit. He didn’t fuss too much, which was a huge relief. He also didn’t let me put on his pajama top after I’d taken off his shirt, so his Aunt Mitzi let him have some half-naked time. I’m sure he is forever grateful. I also taught him how to high-five, so I have made my contribution to the social development of this child. I can relax now.
If only I could. Just ONE MORE HOUR, FOR THE LOVE OF G-D AND ALL THAT IS HOLY!!!!! I just want to SLEEP! How much do you want to bet that I’ll sleep like a baby once I get up to Syracuse? But that’s not when I need the sleep. I need it NOW.
Waaaah.
